Five Driving Waves and What They Really Mean

A comprehensive list.

  1. Open hand SINGLE wave. Otherwise known as “the friendly wave,” this is the cornerstone of driver-to-driver thankfulness. It represents 90% of all driver waves, and basically says “hey, thanks. I’ve got a clear head and a purpose in life, so I’m gonna wave once, and if you miss it, too fucking bad. I have driving to do.”
  2. Open hand MULTIPLE waves –  The number of hand  waves you execute is directly correlated to how over-excited and thankful you are, and possibly how much of a caffeinated neurotic mess you are. Two or three waves might just mean you are really grateful to that driver behind you, but if you get north of five waves, it means that you are a desperate people-pleaser and have got to start living for yourself. It could also mean you are on an astounding amount of drugs.
  3. The Shaka – you are in Hawaii, or from Hawaii. If neither of these are true, you shouldn’t be doing this.
  4. Single steady peace sign – hippie.
  5. Waving peace sign – Stoner or gangster. Hippies do not wave their peace signs. It’s true. Not sure how this happened, but only stoners or huge hip hop fans wave their peace signs. It’s a cultural phenomenon that is a total constant. If you’re lucky enough to get a peace-sign from a gangster, it will be waving, not steady, and you must have done something really nice, because we don’t usually wave.